Academy P&P 4.21(M)

4.21

(M.) Recruits shall not utilize any internet or intranet sites to post or cause to be posted any information regarding the academy or law enforcement in general.  "Information" includes photographs or other graphic depictions.

...well guess what? I ain't in the Academy anymore bitch!

(Let the posting commence.  I will modify the dates on the posts to reflect when it actually happened)

Did Fat Tony make it through the Academy? Stay tuned...

Orientation

Company orientation for The San Diego Police Department was unlike anything I expected. Everyone was there from my Background Detective all the way to the Chief of Police. I've never seen so much brass in one room, and I don't think I'll see it again in my career. We were in a large auditorium and the walls were lined with Captains and Lieutenants representing every division in the Department. We even got to meet the Mayor and he shook my hand.

They all introduced themselves, then we all introduced ourselves. I felt slightly insignificant because we had a lot of people with military experience (some had 20 year careers), lots of people with various college degrees... overall people with more experience than me. What did I have? Well I've been a bouncer for three years...

We signed up for our medical/dental benefits, 401K, POA (police union), and the infamous San Diego City Pension. I was made.

Then we went to the equipment room and were issued our riot helmet, wooden baton, first aid kit, handcuffs, pepper spray, finger print kit, and some other items. In all about 10% of the required equipment for the Academy. Latter I made a few trips to the local police uniform store and I had to buy more than a thousand dollars worth of equipment. Oh well, I was set for life now.

Conditional Hire

So I was hired... conditionally upon successful completion of a full physical and psychological evaluation.

The medical was no problem, just a full physical; hearing, sight, drug test, EKG, x-rays, lung test, then the doctor grabs your balls and makes you cough. Fun times.

I wasn't so sure about the psych test. It was an interview that only lasted five minutes! Who knows what he's looking for.

After about a week I got news I was cleared.

Interview

As soon as the polygraph was over, around noon, I went to work until 8:00pm. At 9:00pm I went on another ride along with my local Division. It was a routine night, but I loved it. I got lots of good advise about the Interview and tips to impress the board. I had to cut the ride along short at around 3:00am so the Officer took me back to the station and I went home to try and sleep.

I woke up a few hours latter and was at the station a half hour early. New tailored suit, clean shave, shined shoes, and a large energy drink... I was as ready as I could be.

I imaged the interview in a huge room where I stood alone facing a panel of 6 veterans that would take turns drilling me with questions.

Good thing I was punctual because they called me in 15 minutes early. The interview was in an office with two Sergeants, and I got to sit down. I was asked 4 questions that I aced. I answered in a commanding manner and only stuttered twice. Six minutes later I was done, back to the waiting area. When I was called back in the Sergeants told me I was exactly what they were looking for, then they signed my conditional letter of hire. I was in.

Before I left I answered two 500 question psychological tests. All the questions were true/false. Here are some of the memorable ones:

• Do you like Milk?
• Do you like to fix door hinges?
• If you were a painter, would you paint flowers?

Polygraph

As I was waiting in the lobby, I couldn't help but overhear a homeless lady trying to file a report at the front desk about some far fetched incident that happened in OC months ago. Is this what I had in store for myself? Was I going though this whole process just to deal with adults that could not deal with the world...

So I get up to the fifth floor just to find out that my Polygraph administrator had called in sick. Great. I spoke with another polygraph administrator, and I told him about my tight time line to get into the April Academy. He was sympathetic and said he would get to me today but I would have to wait until after his appointment with an informant.

I decided to sneak up to to the top floor were the cafeteria was listed on the elevator directory. Would my "5th Floor Only" visitor badge cause my any trouble? Oh well, I was starving. Damn I forgot my wallet in the car. As the elevator came back to the lobby I was meet by a Detective, "Hey I've been looking for you. The informant has a cold and you can't be polygraphed if you have any illness. So you're up, kid."

If you've never been polygraphed it's a trip. First you know all the questions ahead of time, so there is time for the questions to marinate on your long term memory. Next you are hooked up to monitors for sweat, blood pressure, breathing, movement, and you're recorded on camera.

After each question you have to wait about ten seconds to record your reaction. For ten seconds you can't move, or breath weird (hard to do when you're thinking about breathing).

I'll tell you I passed. But at the same time I now know polygraph is not a science. There were questions that I should have shown activity on, but I didn't. Then I supposedly showed activity on Marijuana questions. "Yeah, bullshit I've never used Marijuana in my life." The next five minutes of silents were finally interrupted by the administrator, "OK, good enough for me. You passed."

My panel interview is tomorrow.

Funny side note; Daniel had the same polygraph administrator as I did, and he was also "showing activity on Marijuana," but the guy didn't pass him. So he's out. And Chris got the boot after they looked at his PIQ. Hard times.

Fast Tracked

So the PAT was on a Saturday. The very next Monday I was making trips to my high school for transcripts, getting forms notarized, filling out my 30+ page history packet, and contacting my references. Good thing because by Tuesday a Detective from Backgrounds called me to turn in my packet ASAP so she could try to get me into the April Academy.

Full suit and tie I turned in my packet as soon and the Police Headquarters opened on Thursday. Took 45 seconds including waiting.

By Friday I had my Background Interview with the Detective. I took about three hours. Afterwards I was scheduled for a Polygraph Interview the following Thursday.

PAT and PIQ

I knew I wouldn't have a problem on the written test. After all I took the SD Sheriff's test at age 19 to try to work in Detentions, and I scored well. So when I found out I passed (actually most people pass, so they only call the people that fail), it was no surprise. But now I had a challenge; the PAT.

Funny side note: Daniel took the written test 3 time before passing.

I made two trips up to the obstacle course on my own time and fuel (fucking oil companies; $3.60/gal.). The first time I ran the course I forgot my watch so the only thing I found out was that I could get over the six foot wall with no problem. Then the night before the PAT I went back there with my buddy Daniel and we ran it in about three minutes, but there was no 155lbs. dummy to drag.

So a few hours later there we were, back at Miramar for the PAT. I carpooled with Daniel and we were just barely on time. As I was walking to the back of a 300 person line, I saw my buddy Chris near the front. He had arrived an hour early. Ironic because the line was split in half and he ended up in the same alphabetical group as us.

We were in group two, which meant we would fill out the PIQ (Preliminary Investigation Questioner) before the PAT. I had to tell them everything bad I've ever done... ever. They asked about drugs, high school suspensions, sex with animals, kiddie porn, anarchist groups... And every time you checked the YES box you had to write a paragraph about it in detail. After a while I just started checking the NO box to avoid writing a novel about some trivial thing that barely applied. I'm all for honestly but I don't think they care about... never mind.

So that took about two hours. Then we all grouped up near the six foot wall to cheer on our peers. Cheering doesn't come naturally to me, it's just not my personality, but if it's what they're looking for, then give me a mini-skirt because I want this.

The main point of failure was the six foot wall. Especially if you're not as tall as me, you really need that upper body strength.

I was up. First you climb up and down two ladders; I messed up a little because I started up the wrong latter, nothing major. Then its 70 stairs, down and up; fatigue sets in. After the stairs you weave in and out of cones; what is this, a dog show? Then the three, four, and six foot walls; no problem, but I'm getting very winded. Next is the 155lbs. dummy drag; this fucker is heavy plus I'm exhausted, but I took it slow and steady. My time was 2:05 after the dummy drag, on to the 100 (or so) yard sprint. I was beat, so I kinda jogged it until the last quarter, then I gave it everything I had. Final time 3:06/3:30.

Side note: Daniel got the best time in our group; 2:26

Testing

BACKGROUND

The San Diego Police Department gives three written tests a month, and one PAT. The City of San Diego is in a major fiscal crisis involving the pension. Cut backs and pension reform are coming, and everyone knows it. So their Police Force is jumping ship (there are about 12 Police Department in the County) to secure better salaries, and they are having a hard time finding new Recruits due to the looming financial problems.

Hey good for me. At this point I don't care about pensions and salary, I just wanna be a cop.

But SDPD won't just take any geek off the street. They keep their hiring standards high. If that means that fewer cops are on the streets and more money is being spent on overtime, so be it. Better than having incompetent people that could cost the City more in lawsuits when they fuck up.

THE TEST

So the test is at 8:30 in the morning. I decide to get there by 7:00 because only the first 150 people get in. I went with my buddy Chris from work, and my childhood friend Daniel.

Chris wore a business suit, which was overkill since I suspect some of the people there were homeless, but at least he stood out in a positive way.

I only had about 3 hours of sleep and a McBreakfast, but I felt good. The test was 75 questions that didn't require previous knowledge of law enforcement; mostly reading comprehension, some logic, and grammar. Honestly it was cake. I think I might have only missed 3 questions. Not that it matters; it's a pass/fail test with no ranking.

They said they would call today if I failed. So far I'm in the clear.

Going For It

I've had March 15th, 2008 marked on my calender for more than a month now. I've wanted to take the test for over a year now, but the thought of rejection kept me away. It wasn't so much a fear of failing the "fill in the bubble" part. It was fear of the PAT (physical agility test), that comes on the Saturday following.

Despite the user name I chose for this Blog, I can assure you I am not fat, nor do I resemble a Tony. But I am by no means "in shape." I'm a 21 year old college student, so by default I watch TV, surf the Internet, and lack my fair share of exercises. I didn't play sports in high school, and as my metabolism has begun to wear off, I've developed a nice reserve of stored energy above my belt.

But for the past month I've been eating right, riding my bicycle, playing basketball, doing push ups, and (the dreaded) running. I've made progress, and I have confidence in myself now.